While we may not always recognize the immediate benefits of fostering a good relationship with students, they do indeed exist. It’s important to note that seeking a relationship with the expectation of changing others is not the goal. Rather, it’s often a preference that leans one way, stemming from limited interaction, but positive, potentially influenced by a fixed mindset or specific thinking style.
The process of altering one’s thinking style is often recognized to transform a person’s life, particularly when addressing biases within relationships. There isn’t a definitive right or wrong when it comes to an individual’s preferred thinking style in managing relationships; it’s more about the quality of interaction. However, when we critique someone’s thinking style, we unintentionally fault them for their lack of experience, failing to acknowledge that their perceptions are often shaped by external influences. Can we reasonably fault individuals for relying on the guidance provided by others? Essentially, it’s akin to blaming an innocent person. Instead of criticism, what’s needed is our assistance in cultivating healthy relationships while also imparting the value of independence.
Hence, bias remains an inevitable aspect of human interaction; it serves as a signal indicating areas of neglect or excessive focus. When establishing a relationship with someone, we equip them with a tool they can utilize when necessary. However, throughout this process, various negative factors may disrupt the dynamics. These factors encompass misunderstandings from others, misunderstandings from the individual themselves. Yet, it’s not crucial for the individual to succumb to these factors; life persists until an issue arises—either the individual struggles to find a resolution, or we find ourselves unable to sustain the environment we’ve created for their growth.
What is erroneous with the environment we’ve established for them? Or what’s askew within the relationship? The truth is, the issue often rests with us. We may have failed to provide a conducive atmosphere, akin to clean air, necessary for their progress. In essence, relationships fostering personal growth can be rooted in fallacies when initiated within unprofessional settings, such as guidance from parents who lack proper training or direction. It’s crucial to understand that any relationship, especially at its inception, must be founded on goodwill and ensconced within an environment that offers proper guidance and direction for the individual’s growth; otherwise, it may result in hardship. Sometimes, undoing is more prudent than persisting in actions that don’t facilitate positive outcomes.
Sometimes, certain impressions can yield effects of an unforeseen magnitude, making it challenging to gauge their impact. Timing, appropriateness of application, and directing these impressions towards the right individuals are crucial to prevent significant losses. It’s essential to recognize that we often engage with individuals who are innocent, immature, and in various stages of growth. Manipulating relationships based on misconceptions or fallacies can be tremendously harmful and inherently absurd. Nevertheless, there exists an exception to this scenario. Instances arise where a negative assumption, initially leading to objection, can be reframed into a positive assumption. Through this transformation, we ultimately demonstrate its harmlessness, effectively resolving our issues. Simply put, the expected losses can be mitigated.
Why do we invest effort in establishing and nurturing relationships? Because we understand their inherent value, recognizing that a positive, enduring relationship brings lifelong benefits. As mentors, our responsibility lies in fostering such positive relationships guided by positivity, enabling our students—despite their immaturity—to grow in a constructive manner even though regret is unavoidable.
